Well, that was a strange week . . .I will be honest with you because I don't want you to think life is all sunshine and happiness. I struggle each day, but not every moment of the day. That to me is a success; I get up and continue to do what I have to for normalcy and to show my boys that our life will continue on. Every February we always vacationed. The perfect time to get out of New Hampshire, but this year I hadn't booked a trip because of everything going on. My boys wanted to go away, so a few weeks ago I set out to find a trip that we could afford . . .well, Florida I thought would be easy, but holy SH*T the prices were ridiculous! I ended up finding a trip to Puerto Rico at such a good price for the 3 of us and we have never been, so, why not!
Anyways, the first weekend of vacation before we flew out, we did our normal stuff, skiing at McIntyre, bowling and we visited our friends at Pembroke City Limits! Such a great day, listening to a great band, Lee & Dr.G - check them out, we bought some records and played bingo to raise money for Darbster Rescue. The first few days very successful vacation! Then the travel delays started . . . We ended up not arriving in Puerto Rico until Wednesday at 4:30pm and into rush hour San Juan traffic. Finally at the resort around 6pm. We stayed in Dorado Beach and it was lovely just to feel sunshine on our faces. We ate out, went go karting, bowling, pickle ball, hung at the pool and beach, saw lizards, saw stray cats, and stray chickens. Finished a book, we laughed a lot, but I also cried. It's hard to be the only adult on a trip, or just in life. I love my boys so much but often found myself lonely. They are getting older and do their own things, so I found myself having a drink by myself, going to the casino (won $1300!) by myself and each time I was alone, my heart was lost without Jeff, but it's okay to feel this pain, to breakdown and to cry. Twenty-five years with another human by your side; I will not be better over night, I accept that. We were supposed to depart on Saturday but because of the delay getting there, I booked another night closer to the airport and we stayed in San Juan on Saturday night. We visited Old San Juan, ate incredible food, tried another beach and again just enjoyed the sunshine.
Sunday, we flew home and arrived to snow! So glad it didn't last long. Revo Casino is doing camping giveaways on Sundays and I had planned to meet my folks there. So we got home, I threw in some laundry and off I left to hangout with my folks. It was nice to be around adults again. And it was even nicer that I didn't just earn my camping gift, but I left with over $800! Winning! Then home to hang with my mother in law, sister in law and nephews, plus Otis got to see his cousin Maple. They were thrilled!
Every day is a new day, every day I wake up and although it might not be all smiles, I am taking each day to heal and each day to learn and grow.
Hope you all had a nice break if you had one or just a nice weekend.